Acceptance or Denial? It’s Your Choice to Make!

Acceptance or Denial? It’s Your Choice to Make!

When we are struggling in coping with a troubling issue, we basically have two choices: We can accept the underlying reality of the situation, or we can deny it.  It’s your choice to make! I strongly encourage people to choose acceptance because...

Are You a Love Controller?

Are you or your loved one a love controller? If so, this can be very hard on the relationship. Love control obstructs the romantic flow.  It forces the action, rather than allowing the love currents to unfold naturally so that people can relax...

The Link Between Addiction and Control

The lives of addicts often reel out of control, especially for those who have not started down the path to personal recovery. Many feel ashamed and powerless over their addiction and many things in their lives. To counter their anxiety and...

10 Ways the Need to Control Hurts You

image by Sara Hasse Many people call them control freaks.  Some call them controllers.  Others refer to them as nitpickers and micromanagers.  Whatever you call them, they all have one clear thing in common: The Need to Control. Hence, the...

Control and Impermanence

One of the illusions about control is that many of us believe we can significantly alter or impact the natural flow of things, or as I like to say, “life’s natural currents.” This is why our friends or loved ones may refer to us as control...

5 Common Myths of Control Freaks

Most control freaks live a life filled with grand illusions and myths about the efficacy of control.  Here are five common myths that control freaks harbor:   Control Freaks Myth #1: The power to significantly change others. Truth: The only...

Control Freak Bosses Are Poor Managers

The compulsion to control at work can be so strong that we rarely stop to consider how much it harms us, our employees, and of course, our business. This is particularly true with respect to micro-managers, nit-pickers, and other control...

Intentions for Letting Go of Control in 2016

Still feel the need to control too much in your life?   Setting intentions for letting go of control is one of the best ways in which to reduce the need or compulsion to control people and things and enjoy the serenity that is sure to follow...

Intentions for Letting Go of Control in 2015

Have you set your intentions for 2015 yet? Because of their importance to my serenity, I annually review and update my intentions for letting go of control. Such intentions are highly effective in reducing our need or compulsion to control...

Leaders Need to Know When to Relinquish Control

One of the main purposes of this blog is to demonstrate the harms of excessive control in all areas of our lives, the benefits of letting go of control and how to do it.   In that regard, my posts (and book) examine the many facets of the control...

Understanding Control Freak Dynamics

In Losing Control, Finding Serenity: How the Need to Control Hurts Us and How to Let It Go and on this blog I write about how to deal with control freaks (and excessive controllers) and what’s behind their often abusive behavior. Thomas J...

How Confidence Helps Tame Control Freaks

In my radio interviews following the publication of Losing Control, Finding Serenity, I am frequently asked for advice on how people can deal with the control freaks in their lives, whether it be a controlling spouse at home or a control freak...