Truths and Tips #3: Letting Go of Control

Truths and Tips #3: Letting Go of Control

Q: How can we reduce our fears so that we will control less?  (Part 2) A: Letting Go of Control Truths and Tips Q&A #2 emphasized the importance of identifying our fears as the first step in reducing or removing them. Once you have a clearer...

Letting Go of Control Truths and Tips (#2)

Letting Go of Control Truths and Tips (#2)

Truth and Tips Q&A #1 explained how fear was the prime driver of our need to control others and outcomes. Q&A #2 is a logical follow up: Q:How can we reduce our fears so that we will control less? (Part One)  A:  Effectively reducing our...

Letting Go of Control Truths and Tips (#1)

Letting Go of Control Truths and Tips (#1)

The need to reign in our unhealthy compulsion to control is thus more important than ever, whether we are a so-called “control freak,” a micro-manager, a nitpicker, or simply someone who controls excessively. Toward that end, I will be sharing...

The Trust—Control Dynamic

The Trust—Control Dynamic

Many of us have trust issues and are control freaks. Have you ever thought about the connection or dynamic between control and trust? Or more specifically, about how trust impacts our ability to let go of control? To be truthful, I hadn’t given...

10 Ways the Need to Control Hurts You

10 Ways the Need to Control Hurts You

Many people call them control freaks.  Some call them controllers.  Others refer to them as nitpickers and micromanagers.  Whatever you call them, they all have one clear thing in common: The Need to Control. Hence, the subtitle of my book Losing...

5 Common Myths of Control Freaks

5 Common Myths of Control Freaks

Most control freaks live a life filled with grand illusions and myths about the efficacy of control.  Here are five common myths that control freaks harbor: Control Freaks Myth #1: The power to significantly change others. Truth: The only person...

Control Freak Bosses Are Poor Managers

Control Freak Bosses Are Poor Managers

The compulsion to control at work can be so strong that we rarely stop to consider how much it harms us, our employees, and of course, our business. This is particularly true with respect to micro-managers, nit-pickers, and other control...

Let Go of Control to Gain Control of Your Children

Let Go of Control to Gain Control of Your Children

Many parents are frustrated and distressed because they feel they have lost control over their children.  Things have just gotten too out of hand–for some, alarmingly so.  The natural inclination for such parents is to become more controlling in...

The Trust–Control Dynamic

The Trust–Control Dynamic

Have you ever thought about the connection or dynamic between control and trust?   Or more specifically, about how trust impacts our ability to let go of control?  To be truthful, I hadn’t given it much thought until I read and successfully...

When Parents Fail to Surrender Control at School

When Parents Fail to Surrender Control at School

School and education is particularly rife with parental control, whether it’s parents choosing their children’s classes, offering too much advice or help with homework, or constantly “coming to the rescue.” I have previously shared my strong...

Understanding Control Freak Dynamics

Understanding Control Freak Dynamics

In Losing Control, Finding Serenity: How the Need to Control Hurts Us and How to Let It Go and on this blog I write about how to deal with control freaks (and excessive controllers) and what’s behind their often abusive behavior. Thomas J...